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So my wife and I just had our 5th child. (there's a joke in that alone)  She was nearly 2 weeks late when she finally went into labor.  The day before we had the baby, she had a doctor's appointment.  The doctor informed us that the office policy is to not let a pregnancy go past 42 weeks.  In spite of our protests about wanting it to occur naturally, they insisted and scheduled an induction 2 days later.  As the doctor left the room, I said "This is just forced induction!"

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True story:

When I was growing up, 1 of my siblings told my dad that all their friends get an allowance, and ask him "why don't we?"

He responded with "Some kids you have to pay to be good, but you kids are good for nothing."

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I have just finished interviewing a young man for a job at my workplace.

I asked, "Can you perform under pressure?"

"I'm not sure, but I do an amazing Bohemian Rhapsody!" he replied.

I hired him on the spot.

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In other news, Vietnam has announced that they're going back to the old names for places like Ho Chi Minh City.

 

They've decided to let Saigons be Saigons.

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Racecar spelled backward is racecar.

 

Racecar upside down is expensive.

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What's the difference between a golf ball and a Ford?

 

You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.

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Back when we were developing the Viper and working on sealing water leaks in the trunk and soft top, someone brought up a story of how MB tests their trunks for sealing.

"If you throw a cat in the trunk, close the decklid. and it's dead the next morning, the trunk was sealed up good."

We tried it on the Viper, and when we came back the next day, the cat was gone.

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And another one from those days:

"What do a Chrysler B-van and a Jehova's Witness have in common?"

"You can't slam the door on either one of them!"

(The van's sliding door was notorious for binding or falling off the tracks.)

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5 hours ago, mcoppola said:

Back when we were developing the Viper and working on sealing water leaks in the trunk and soft top, someone brought up a story of how MB tests their trunks for sealing.

"If you throw a cat in the trunk, close the decklid. and it's dead the next morning, the trunk was sealed up good."

We tried it on the Viper, and when we came back the next day, the cat was gone.

I worked as a shop foreman for MB when they owned Chrysler and used a variation of this same joke (the cat was alive but unconscious). :)

Edited by mender
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Got this off the Triumph Spitfire FB racing page... nice Thone!!

 

Not sure if it is a joke a day but I might have enough wrenches to start on one! Lol

D9AAC7C8-73B0-4D62-B4D3-A8AEA79DD649.jpeg

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If those are all Whitworth wrenches, like many British things from that era that throne is either worth a fortune - or nothing. :)

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That is a no crapper!  I have a small set of that junk from my dad and his 50’s/60’s British motorcycles lol

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You  will probably like this one as well :)

Got this one from a Doctor friend of mine lol  Although I probably saw this in the Navy as well lol

 

Edited, This one didn't come from the same doctor friend but did come from one of my Navy Forums

 


 

10393898_10208591834929948_4048007885889289176_n.jpg

Edited by 67Mustang
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I'll readily admit to being a prude when it comes to language that I consider less than erudite ... ;)

 

I know that some seem to revel in the idea that one particular word can constitute up to half of the content of the average conversation, but I'm not one of them!

Edited by mender

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when the mood strikes, I can almost attain this level.... I did something like this when I put in a tankless hot water heater.  I was a bit put off when the heater control board died just out of warranty.  That was my first experience with board component replacement.  It had a blown electrolytic cap and I replaced it but failed to use the correct temp range and it failed again later and took out more stuff so I got fed up and junked it and thus junked my copper work lol.

 

30629834_1840856392631386_2928763097067814912_n.jpg

Edited by 67Mustang
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Reminds me of when a customer asked me to do a "nice" job wiring up a '34 Ford hot rod; should have taken a picture of the final product but this is a simpler version:

Image result for ocd wiring

 

I hate troubleshooting cars that somebody wired using one 500 foot spool of wire because they didn't want to spend money on different colours:

 

Image result for ocd wiring

Edited by mender
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